Speed Racer Episodes...That Never Made It

"SR and The Deadly DMV License-Renewal Adventure" (five parts; three of which are Speed standing in line, waiting)
"SR and Road Rage"
"The Mach 5 Gets Rear-Ended" (three parts...features a really gory scene where Speed Racer beats the brains out of the poor yutz that rear-ended him)
"SR and The Race to Get a Jar of BrylCreme Before the Store Closes"
"SR and The Speed Trap of Doom"
"SR and The Quest For A Vacant Parking Space"


"Speed Racer and The Deadly DMV License-Renewal Adventure"
Part 1
Our hero wakes up one morning to find that his license has expired. So he grabs his girlfriend and his best friend Sparky and they hit the DMV. He is given a number and told to wait.
Part 2
Speed's number is called and he gets to stand in line.
Part 3
Speed is still standing in line. Highlights of the show include Speed's conversation with Sparky over a bad guy that Speed recently aprehended and sent to jail, and Speed's girlfriend Trixie combing her hair.
Part 4
Speed is still waiting in line. Highlights of the show include Sparky's stomach growling, Speed yawning, and Trixie re-applying her eyeliner.
Part 5
Speed finally gets to the counter to get his license. Among other things, he is forced to take an eye test off a really fuzzy chart that he almost passes, but not quite. However, the lady at the desk gives it to him anyway, since he's really, really cute. Trixie walks off in a huff. Speed gets his license, but to his dismay the picture on it barely resembles him. Be sure to tune in next week for the next (yawn) thrilling adventure.

"Speed Racer and Road Rage"
Speed comes to the conclusion that it is a lot easier to give a reckless driver a flip of the bird instead of a list of driving tips over sodas at a malt shop. Sparky is ordered by Pops to remove the sawblades from the Mach 5 after an incident with a pedestrian who stepped off the corner a bit too soon.

"The Mach 5 Gets Rear-Ended"
Part 1
While the Mach 5 is parked outside a malt shop, some random driver who's glanced down to push the button on his radio slams into the back of it. Speed, who's managed to get into a brawl with somebody in the malt shop over driving technique, doesn't even notice until he goes outside to get into his car to go home. Uh-oh.
Part 2
Speed Racer, realizing he does not have auto insurance, blows a gasket and spends 15 minutes of a 30-minute episode beating the snot out of the other driver. Trixie reminds Speed of Sparky and Speed relents, giving the poor battered dude a driver's-ed lesson. Trixie sneaks off and calls the cops.
Part 3
Speed gets arrested, and he gets sent to jail for six months on charges of assault and battery. Sparky fixes the Mach 5 and Trixie considers dumping Speed's butt. However, Speed eventually gets out of jail and everybody lives happily ever after. Great.

"Speed Racer and The Race to Get a Jar of BrylCreme Before the Store Closes"
Speed runs out of hair gel the night before the big race. Since absolutely NOBODY will recognize him with his bangs down, he decides to get another jar of hair gel. But looking at the clock, he realizes that Dick's Drugstore will close in ten minutes and that he will have to get over there quick. Eek. Highlights of the show include Speed using the belt grip tires to drive on the sides of buildings to avoid traffic (and scare pedestrians). You'll never see a man happier to get a jar of BrylCreme.

"Speed Racer and The Speed Trap of Doom"
Speed gets pulled over by a cop and is ticketed for doing 80 in a 35 mph zone. He is given additional fines for being a racecar driver, and for really being named "Speed". By the end of the episode, he is $500 poorer. Pops blows a gasket.

"Speed Racer and The Quest For A Vacant Parking Space"
Speed takes Trixie to the mall and discovers that the parking lot is close to full. He spends most of the episode driving around in circles looking for a space. Highlights of the show include Trixie checking her watch, and Speed rolling his eyes when someone almost pulls out but doesn't.


From Stéphane_Dumas <stephdumas@videotron.ca> of Canada:

"Knight Speed": (crossover with Knight Rider) Speed never admitted and neither the members of the FLAG, Devon Miles and Wilton Knight. Speed was recruited by the FLAG and was supposed to be the driver of a futuristic car but unfortunately the futurustic car was KARR and not KITT. It's wasn't a good day for Speed. Later due to some coincidence, he meets the path of Michael Knight and KITT who ask Speed a service....


If you have any ideas of your own for 'Speed Racer Episodes That Never Made It', then send 'em in! You can also send fictional summaries of the episodes to go along with the titles, if you want. Just make sure to leave your name/alias so I can give you credit.